Wed, May. 11th, 2005, 05:16 pm
| You scored as agnosticism. You are an agnostic. Though it is generally taken that agnostics neither believe nor disbelieve in God, it is possible to be a theist or atheist in addition to an agnostic. Agnostics don't believe it is possible to prove the existence of God (nor lack thereof).|
Agnosticism is a philosophy that God's existence cannot be proven. Some say it is possible to be agnostic and follow a religion; however, one cannot be a devout believer if he or she does not truly believe.
Which religion is the right one for you? (new version)
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Sun, May. 1st, 2005, 06:48 am
Here's how my life is working lately.
((WARNING: This is a very emo-kid post.))
If you keep up w/ my journal,
You know all the shit that is happening w/ my theatre job.
Also, I think I'm going to have to quit my radio job,
Because my boss keeps hedging when I ask for more hours.
I want very desperately to get out of the house.
I love my mom and my family, but I'm nineteen.
I need to get the hell out.
There are plans to move to New Jersey with a group of my friends,
But a lot of us need to finish stuff here in Kansas first,
So we're all gonna move out into a big house,
Split rent and stuff, it's cheaper the more people you have.
At least that was the plan.
Every landlord we've talked to, or has shown us a house,
Only sees us as this group of hooligans
That's gonna tear up their house.
At this point, however, I'm thinking that's a good thing.
I've started to have these realizations...
Yesterday, I was shooting photo's for my final,
The theme being "A Day in My Life."
I have to shoot and print 5 photo's that describe that theme.
I shot my family, some food's that I eat on a regular basis,
The college's Fine Arts building, the theatre,
And I wanted to have one of my group of friends.
With is composed of: Josh, Chase, Kristina, Jeff,
No-Party Chris, Brian (who lives about 4 hrs away)
And, of course, Sean.
So I called Josh, told him what was up,
And asked him to tell Jeff (they live together).
On the phone, I could hear Josh talking to Jeff,
Then he told me that Jeff wouldn't be coming,
And that he needed to take a shower.
That really kind of pissed me off.
Here I am, basically saying that Jeff
Is one of the five big parts of my life,
And he can't drag himself away from his World of Warcraft
Computer game for half a fucking hour to do me a favor.
So, since we couldn't find Chris (probably working),
And Brian wasn't in town this weekend,
I only had about half the group in the picture.
And Chase was not being very enthusiastic about any of this.
Later in the evening, we were headed to
(What was supposed to be) an antique car show.
And I was not feeling very good,
I was getting a migraine, and so I took some medicine,
Which always makes me drowsy, and I was tired already.
So Sean picked me up, and we went to get Josh.
After Josh got in he said "Hi, Erica!" and I breathed in
To say hi back, and some spit caught in the back of my throat,
And I just ended up coughing.
Sean said, "Erica's in a bad mood."
And I was like, "I'm not in a bad mood,
I just had a realization."
Sean said, "What about?" And I said,
"I don't want to talk about it."
S: "That scares me."
So I explained.
As Josh was walking out, I was wondering if he had told Jeff
That I was really upset that he didn't come that afternoon.
Then I realized, even if Jeff knew I was angry,
I DON'T THINK HE'D CARE.
And while I was thinking about it,
I don't think Chase would care if I was upset with him.
This is not a good sign of a true friend.
The kind of person I am:
If my friends are in pain, I am in pain.
Josh has often told me about his ex, who he is still
Absolutely in love with, but she won't be with him.
When he talks about her, it breaks my heart for him.
Also, I feel that if I know someone is a great person,
(Such as Jeff when he's actually away from his computer),
I want everyone to know it.
I don't want them to hole up in their room,
Or hole up inside themselves.
And all that usually comes out of this,
Is me ending up hurt, or just completely emotionally drained.
I feel like I only have Josh left of the group.
Kristina (who incidentally, is dating Chase)
Is a dear, but I haven't known her for that long.
I just feel sad.
Fri, Apr. 29th, 2005, 09:52 pm
So today I told my Manager @ the movie theatre
That I applied at Walgreen's,
Cause I'm looking for more pay
And a job that'll be more compatible w/ my skool schedule.
I'm trying to move out and I just plain need more money
(Without having to quite skool altogether...
I only have one more semester w/ a few summer classes).
Somehow it comes around to how Callie
(One of the Assistant Managers) and he
Are considering making Jeff an Asst. Manager...
(Now I love Jeff, he's a great guy,
I DO NOT begrudge him this BUT)
I've been there for a year now...
I haven't even gotten a promotion to Quality Advisor,
Which is the next step up from where I am,
(That Jeff might be skipping completely.)
Steven (the Manager) says, "I hope that doesn't make you mad."
(Cause I prolly looked pretty damn shocked.
And here's the kicker:)
"I'd have made you Q.A. by now,
BUT CALLIE DOESN'T WANT YOU TO BE Q.A."
I guess Callie and the District Manager (Steven's upper)
Are just great effing buddies,
And Steven can't make a desicion w/o Callie's input.
And Steven doesn't even know what Callie's problem w/ me is.
She just says she doesn't want me as Q.A.
And that's it.
There will be words... soon.
Last night I stayed til about 2 in the morning,
And then I got up @ 6 this morning
And I haven't taken a nap all day!!
I just lounged around this morning,
(After I got home from the radio station)
Talking to my buddy Alex and listening to musik and stuff...
My internet conked out on me,
So I picked up this book I bought about herbs,
And creating herb gardens and went a'reading.
Inispired, I called Sean and he 'n' I headed over to Ward's,
This pet and plant place on the edge of town.
We got interupted by a call from Chase (see previous entries)
Who asked if we could come over.
We detoured to his house, and found out that his gf Kristina
Had gotten kicked out of her house and needed a little help
Getting all of her stuff over to Chase's.
So we went to Kristina's parents' house,
And her mom and her two brothers are walking in,
Right at the same time as we show up and get out.
They go into the house without a word,
And we start loading stuff up.
Then, right as we're getting ready to take off,
Her brother open the door and screeches "KRISTINA!
You got the wrong TV!"
And the mom comes out after him,
And Kristina said "No this is mine."
But apparently the TV's got mixed up,
So Kristina goes to trade them out,
And as she gets over to the door,
Her mom grabs her arm and yanks her into the house.
At this moment, I get tense.
Sean, Chase and I are waiting,
I'm really not nervous... just kind of anticipating a problem.
Kristina finally comes out,
And Her mom stays in the door frame,
And as Kristina's half way down the drive-way,
Her mom yells "What did you say?"
The mom: "Better not have said anything,
Cause I swear I will knock you down!"
Sean, very calmly: "No, you won't."
The mom: "Yeah, I will."
Kristina: "Sean, don't."
By then, we're all packed up and ready to go,
So Sean says: "You have a good one," to the mom.
The mom, scornfully: "Get the fuck off of my property right now!"
Sean: "You're a real inspiration."
The mom: "Yeah, you too. All three of you are a great
Inspiration to Kristina, you fucking bums!" and goes inside the house.
All of this sucked and made me really shaky.
BUT, if she'd have hit Kristina,
I was fully ready to be arrested.
So this afternoon, I went ahead and got my herbs,
I got them potted and planted, yay!!
I got some Spearmint and some Lemon Balm
(Which smells really really good.)
Wed, Apr. 6th, 2005, 06:08 pm
Okay, so this is how my week has gone.
I got a cyst removed from what the doctors called
My "sub-urethral/vaginal" area.
The sewn up area really doesn't hurt,
But my throat feels like the Sahara when I wake up.
And doesn't get any better through out the day.
I guess they intubated me, which fucking sucks.
My throat still fucking hurts,
PLUS I wake up with my nose clogged so tight
I can't break through it with a chisel.
And I'm hacking and coughing all day,
With my voice getting crappier and hoarser.
My mom suggests that it's perhaps not just
The intubation, that I must be sick.
I have Academic Challenge, but no work,
So I'm glad, my voice isn't up for radio work.
I hope upon hope that my voice and sinuses
Will clear up through out the day,
Because I DO have to work tomorrow.
No luck, by the evening I'm calling my boss
To see if someone else can work for me.
Big fucking suprise, there's a misunderstanding,
And no one covers my shift.
This chick Ramona calls me at 8:30
Wondering what's going on, and I just groan.
Sunday is about the peak of my crappiness,
And I just say what I need to and go back to sleep.
Still sick, but I've already missed a bunch of skool.
I go a and muddle my way through classes.
Yay the cold is finally clearing up!
It's still kinda crappy ('specially during band
Since I can't breath very well)
But I can tell it's getting better.
With renewed spirit I go to Sin City,
And half way through, my inner ear starts itching.
Which turns into twinges of pain,
Which turns to a constant aching.
By the midnight, I'm begging Sean to take me home,
So I can just take some meds and go to sleep.
Which, of course, doesn't happen.
I lay down, and every position seems to
Make the pain in my ear worse.
It feels like someone is eating my ear drum.
I sit in the bathroom for an hour,
Holding a warm wash cloth to my ear,
Which is the only thing that seems to help.
After the pain had eased a bit,
I decide that I'll sleep in my Papasan chair
(One of those bowl-chair thingies...)
And the last time I look at the clock before
I pass out it's about 3:30 AM.
I wake up at 7 AM when the alarm goes off for Sean.
And never really make it back to sleep.
The pain in my ear has returned,
So while I get ready, I hold a warm washcloth to my ear summore.
Skool goes okay, but come lunch time,
I'm hurting again, so I decide to go to the Walk-In Clinic.
I'm there for about 2 hours before I even get to see a nurse.
Then I have to wait for the doctor, who tells me I have a
"Nasty ear infection. Like 3 year olds have."
So then, on top of all of this,
I have to get a shot in my BUM.
I think Life decided to bitch slap me this week.
Mon, Mar. 28th, 2005, 02:14 am
New drink I made up:
Ex-Irish Cow --
16 oz. glass
1 can Starbuck's Double Shot Expresso (Ex)
2 shots Bailey's Irish Cream (Irish)
Fill the remainder of the glass with chocolate milk (Cow)
Sun, Feb. 27th, 2005, 10:16 am
I LOVE MY SEANY SEAN!! *Smooch*
So I got home from work today
And the neighbors across ther street
Have this new sign in their yard.
Says something along the lines of:
PROTECT THE CHILDREN
So I will now be putting up a HUGE sign
In our yard, that reads:
"A growing body of scientific literature demonstrates
that children who grow up with 1 or 2 gay and/or lesbian
parents fare as well in emotional, cognitive, social, and
sexual functioning as do children whose parents are heterosexual."
--AMERICAN ACADEMY OF PEDIATRICS
I'm getting sick and tired of all these bigotted fucks
That think so close-mindedly.
If they were told that they couldn't legally bind
Their relationship with the one person they love
Because they're the wrong GENDER...
They'd have a different fucking view on marriage.
ITS NOT MEEEEE!!!
-Steven Piper (The Other Boss)
I worked at the radio station this morning,
As I do every Sunday morning.
My voice was a little scratchy,
Cause I'm getting sick a little,
And last night was a basketball game
And I was screaming my head off.
So I wasn't TOO suprised that my boss, Bob Kirby,
Called me after my shift was over.
The phone rang just as I was leaving,
So I got it on my way out,
Not thinking that he was gonna bitch me out for 10 minutes.
Here's basically how the conversation went
(Maybe not in chronological order, buy hey...):
Me: High Plains Public Radio, Erica speaking.
BK: Hi Erica. You sounded a little 'rough' this morning.
Me: Yeah, I completely lost my voice last night, but it seemed okay this morning. It got a little worse as the morning went on, tho.
BK: Um... Is there any reason you're not following the format in the book? (The Air Room Book, has the new schedules for all the news programs).
Me: What did I do wrong? (I've got the damn thing memorized...)
BK: Well, the top of the hour break... It was completely wrong... The ID should be the last thing we hear before we go to news.
Me: Oh, well the ID has always been in the DU @ 8:59. (The Digital Universe (DU) is the automation program we use sometimes, and ever since they started doing translator ID's, call letters and such, it's been automated in the DU).
BK: I have it written out how I would like it in the book. Apparently you just looked in the book and were like: 'Oh, that's pretty!' and totally disregarded all of my preferences.
Me: (Sort of shocked and angry at that...) I'm sorry. It's always been in the DU...
BK: (Interrupting) I don't care what's in the DU! I HAVE IT HOW I WANT IT IN THE BOOK. It has to be precise...
Then he explained, for like the seventh time, how the breaks work...
Me: I'm sorry (I always ending up apologizing for stupid shit...) I ran out of underwriters. (Underwriters = the advertisements that keep us in the black. You have a list of them for each show, and you read them during the breaks, 2 or 3 at a time. I only had nine for this morning's shows, and 8 breaks. Do the math... right?)
BK: You repeat them! (Unspoken: you fucking retard!)
Me: Oh... really? (Now feeling like a fucking retard, and very insulted.)
More explaining how HE WANTS IT THIS WAY and IT HAS TO PRECISELY HOW I HAVE IT IN THE BOOK...
BK: YOu have a nice day... (Is he fucking SERIOUS?!)
Me: Okay, you too.
Sun, Feb. 13th, 2005, 01:20 pm
| You scored as Mindfuck. Congratulations, you scored Mindfuck. You've probably seen a lot of movies, and have grown to hate mainstream shit. You're looking for the movie that will leave you breathless, and with 21 questions to think about. Check out: Donnie Darko, Being John Malkovich, Pulp Fiction, Memento. |
Mindless Action Flick
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